A Picture Is Worth Years Of Therapy

July 28, 2008

I received this cunning little sketch last week, and it has been sitting on my bedside table while I decide its fate. To scrapbook, or not to scrapbook? To consign to the bottom of the dustbin, or to frame and display in the front hallway? To deconstruct as artifact of postmodern motherhood, or to roll eyes at and discard?

A fistful of Smarties to anyone who can tell me what it is, or at least make some outrageously funny suggestion so that I can appropriate the narrative of this sketch and reframe it into something that won’t keep me awake at night. Which, yes, is a hint.

(It’s two sketches, actually. The scribble below the fold is a separate image, scrawled with a flourish to underscore a point about the main image, above the fold.)

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    MrsWaltz July 28, 2008 at 2:54 pm

    It’s OBVIOUSLY a minimalist profile of a very sad donkey (head only). With a gorgeous signature flair. Duh.

    Nic July 28, 2008 at 2:54 pm

    It’s half a bunny rabbit. The other half is obscured in view.

    Backpacking Dad July 28, 2008 at 2:57 pm

    Now that is clearly a sketch of Rudolph stepping out of the fog on Christmas Eve. The other reindeer and the sleigh are still lost from view. For now.

    Assertagirl July 28, 2008 at 3:02 pm

    Before you said it was two sketches, I saw the figure of a woman, the bottom scribble clearly her bush. heh

    Beck July 28, 2008 at 3:05 pm

    It’s the side view of a charm bracelet!

    Loralee Choate July 28, 2008 at 3:05 pm

    I have a similar sketch in a scrapbook with this caption:

    “My son is going to be a genius. I have no idea what this sketch is supposed to be, which means he is already smarter than his mother.”

    It’s a big favorite around here.

    kittenpie July 28, 2008 at 3:11 pm

    That is so an episiotomy.

    Kristine July 28, 2008 at 3:12 pm

    Oh dear, I’m afraid my OB drew me a similar sketch. So very hurty!

    Overflowing Brain July 28, 2008 at 3:13 pm

    I believe the technical name is “modern art.”

    I’m pretty sure MOMA would frame it and hang it proudly.

    Redneck Mommy July 28, 2008 at 3:14 pm

    It’s clearly a lament on the current state of your nether regions and your posterior.

    It’s a post-modern reflection of the horrors of child birth and the sacrifices we women make for our family, our children.

    That or it’s portrait of what your husband looks like first thing in the morning.

    Nic July 28, 2008 at 3:14 pm

    WAIT! Is that… Frankenvulva?

    Anonymous July 28, 2008 at 3:16 pm

    upside down “cake”

    Manager Mom July 28, 2008 at 3:16 pm

    A recreation of one of Angelina Jolie’s tattoos?

    Her Bad Mother July 28, 2008 at 3:17 pm

    Kittenpie, love, friend – I so WISH that were an episiotomy

    Janet July 28, 2008 at 3:20 pm

    Upside down spider with a quarter falling out of his pocket? Do spider’s even have pockets? I was never good an interpreting art.

    Mr Lady July 28, 2008 at 3:20 pm

    It’s obviously a parachuter, coming down to land on a bouey. Boey. Bouy. Whatever. the orange floaty things in the ocean. You’ve got an airplane jumper on your hands.

    Angella July 28, 2008 at 3:23 pm

    I was thinking vulva, but only because the word makes me laugh.

    Hi. I’m 14.

    Kimblahg July 28, 2008 at 3:24 pm

    haha i’m glad i’m not the only one who thought it looked like a woman’s nether regions.

    nomotherearth July 28, 2008 at 3:28 pm

    Since I’ve been beaten to gate going …THERE…I will say it is a mouth and tongue spitting out a pea. A commentary on your cooking perhaps? That’s what happens everytime I cook, at least…

    Amelia Sprout July 28, 2008 at 3:30 pm

    I don’t even know how to be creative after reading the comments, I’m lauging too hard.

    G Rated – The spoon that the dish ran away with. The bottom is the cow jumping over the moon.

    X Rated – Oh dear, the girl got a mirror and drew a self portrait. I’m not even that brave.

    gorillabuns July 28, 2008 at 3:33 pm

    In our house, it’s called a china.

    Mrs. Mogul July 28, 2008 at 3:38 pm

    It’s either you have a headache or your hub’s pee pee poking you on the head?

    All Adither July 28, 2008 at 3:39 pm

    It’s a hep cat with a soul patch.

    Anyone can see that.

    sweetney July 28, 2008 at 3:41 pm

    i vote sad, half-invisible minimalist bunny.

    Issas Crazy World July 28, 2008 at 3:42 pm

    Text and IM language of the future?

    sara July 28, 2008 at 4:00 pm

    Woman with adam’s apple, runaway nipple and appendectomy scar.

    Pre “surgery”

    I am an artist AND a med student!!

    Bloggymommer July 28, 2008 at 4:06 pm

    Well, clearly, the top picture is a depiction of Sperm, Egg, and Baby.

    I have no idea why M is being scratched out of the bottom picture.

    Keep clutter down by filing the digital picutre of this masterpeiece with the date. Or heck, just archive your blog.

    Mandy July 28, 2008 at 4:12 pm

    I am laughing too hard to come up with something coherent.

    My guess? A boob hanging down from the sky.

    No idea about the landing pad at the bottom.

    toyfoto July 28, 2008 at 4:29 pm

    I have NO IDEA what that is, but something tells me that if I find out I will FINALLY understand where babies come from!

    toyfoto July 28, 2008 at 4:32 pm

    Oh wait. … I just realized it looks suspiciously like the one-antlered deer in Open Season played by ashton kutcher.

    Looks JUST like him, too.

    Ms Picket To You July 28, 2008 at 4:35 pm

    This is a sad one-eyed man with a papaya on his head.

    The artist’s note reads, “Behold the one-eyed man with the papaya on his head. He is sad. He wanted to eat that papaya.”

    Michelle July 28, 2008 at 4:37 pm

    Okay, I think I have it…

    The top one has to be of an old lady trying to relive the 80′s bang style, which no one got to begin with, so that’s why she’s a bit confused/sad.

    The other one is a bit tougher…

    It’s either a downhill skiier heading down the slopes or Prince’s new indentity for 2009.

    Her Bad Mother July 28, 2008 at 4:38 pm

    WTF with y’all seeing REINDEER? and BUNNIES? Am laughing my ass off BUT SERIOUSLY. The Jungian therapy on this one is gonna be BIZARRE.

    Black Hockey Jesus July 28, 2008 at 4:49 pm

    That’s The Wind In Your Vagina.

    Her Bad Mother July 28, 2008 at 4:54 pm

    *falls to floor, gasping for breath, omf THE LAUGHING*

    Stacey July 28, 2008 at 5:19 pm

    It looks like someone who needs their bangs trimmed, has a prominent nose with a mole beside it and they are sad because of one, two or all of those things. That bit on the bottom is them trying to remember the name of their hairstylist – they are fairly certain it doesn’t begin with an M.

    That’s what I came up with after I got my mind out the gutter

    Pgoodness July 28, 2008 at 5:25 pm

    I have no clue, but am enjoying the comments!!

    Heather July 28, 2008 at 5:27 pm

    Why is it that doctor’s can’t write clearly, but they can draw something like that just fine. Ouch.

    moosh in indy. July 28, 2008 at 5:57 pm

    Yeah, that’s your goodies.
    And yeah, sorry about that.

    MommyTime July 28, 2008 at 6:00 pm

    It’s a sad little one-eyed girl wearing Sarah Jessica Parker’s hat from the Sex and the City movie premier. The doodle below is her dress.

    Immoral Matriarch July 28, 2008 at 6:03 pm

    Umm. Yes, that is the frankenvulva.

    Christina July 28, 2008 at 6:21 pm

    Yeah, I can’t compete with the comment from Black Hockey Jesus.

    It looks to me like your lady parts, with extra emphasis of the area that didn’t survive the trauma of birth well.

    Maggie, Dammit July 28, 2008 at 6:43 pm

    I think it’s a little one-eyed man (not *that* one) who is crying because his tongue and his magnifying glass are plastered to his forehead.


    Her Bad Mother July 28, 2008 at 7:42 pm

    There’s gonna have to be a special prize for ‘SJP’s hat’, I think.

    Anonymous July 28, 2008 at 7:47 pm

    I did not read the comments yet so maybe someone said this…
    But I think it is your breast and nipple and it is dripping milk…that is when I did not know it is two pictures….

    Am not sure is it because of all the post about your breast being in pain and all…or really I am in that state!

    Rachael July 28, 2008 at 8:09 pm

    I am afraid that I would not be saving the drawing as it is a little too Georgio O’Keefe-ish for me. I DONT LIKE HER ‘FLOWER’ ART. And I am no prude, it just really gets me for some reason…

    Mrs. Chicky July 28, 2008 at 8:32 pm

    Oh wow. If that’s Frankenvulva then I am so sorry. And if that bottom sketch is how you tore and were stitched up, then I am even sorrier still. Ouch.

    Tootsie Farklepants July 28, 2008 at 9:10 pm

    I think it’s upside down. If you turn it around it’s clearly a vagina, a belly button, and the underneath of one boob.

    And the doodle is a wavy line indicating anger. Or that it’s hot.

    samantha July 28, 2008 at 9:53 pm

    I too see a half invisible sad bunny.

    flutter July 28, 2008 at 10:13 pm

    “self portrait in repose, balanced on a whirlwind”

    or something

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