That, too, did pass.
The children fell asleep, eventually, and I regained my calm, and even though the night was not a peaceful one, it was fine, I managed, it was only, after all, some hours, some very few hours, out of a life that is otherwise filled with love and joy and good things (like their sweet, sweet faces and heart-bursting smiles, which I love so much, so very much, even when I’m screaming or crying or groaning – from frustration, from exhaustion – on the inside.) The cats might have suffered a little bit of verbal abuse (I appreciate their commitment to standing sentry at the crib of the screaming baby, but their inclination to lend their ear-piercing Siamese yowls to the chorus of shrieking did nothing to mellow my harsh) but otherwise, we all made it through the night with our hearts and minds intact. More’s the blessing.
And now, today, the little man and I take our leave for the weekend, for a little drive down to Boston with this fine lady. I will miss the husband and the girl – the girl will grow even bigger in these coming three days, and I will miss those days of growing, which speed by too quickly now – but the break from the everyday will be good. Restorative. Fun.
I need this.