their bad father

Flying Without Wings

June 19, 2011

I can still remember, vividly, the day that my father taught me to ride a bicycle. We lived at the end of a quiet suburban street lined with cherry and dogwood trees, our house set back from the cul-de-sac by what seemed to me, at age 5, to be a very long and very wide drive, perfect for small bicycles, and my dad and I spent hours there together as I circled that drive, round and round and round, on my little bike with the big training wheels. On the day that the wheels came off, we left the security of that smooth-paved drive and went out onto the street.

Dad kept his hand on my back as I pedaled down the street, and he kept it there as I pedaled back up the street, and he kept there as I pedaled down again and up again and with every pass the pressure of his hand became lighter and lighter and lighter until suddenly I couldn’t feel it there anymore, and I was flying, all on my own, and I remember that moment, I remember it keenly, that moment of sudden, terrifying, exhilarating realization that I was on my own, that I was doing it on my own, that I could do it all on my own, and I turned my head to see where he was, and he was there, of course, just some distance back, smiling as wide as I would ever see him smile, thrilled, proud, because this was something we’d done together, this thing, this getting me to be able to do this all on my own, and he was prouder of me than I was of myself, and the cherry trees and the dogwood trees flashed by me as I sped along, not looking where I was going, and it was wonderful, wonderful. And then I crashed into the bushes on someone’s lawn, and I cried. Keep reading…

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Where The Wild Things Were

June 6, 2011

My husband’s summary assessment of his solo camping trip with the badgers, from his Facebook page: “Lessons from camping: 1) Hot dogs go with everything. 2) The five year old girl is really in charge. 3) One parent, two kids is a sub-optimal ratio.” I’d like to say that I didn’t say ‘I TOLD YOU [...]

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Into The Wild

June 2, 2011

Here is what I’m worrying about today: 1) My husband has taken the children camping. 2) In a tent. 3) Without me. The camping itself isn’t worrying, I suppose. My parents took my sister and I camping all the time and it was awesome, and I love the idea of doing the same with my [...]

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That Dream Within A Dream

September 22, 2010

Happy anniversary to my beloved dork. I miss you. ***** Today, more hospitals, more moms, more children, and, I’m sure, more lessons like this. A little less terror-driving would be nice, though. Fearlessness has its limits. ***** Last night at the United Nations, Canada’s Prime Minister, Stephen Harper, pledged Canada’s full support to the UN’s [...]

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Happy Birthday, Pass The Bail Money

August 1, 2010

It’s Kyle’s birthday today. I’m not going to tell you how old he is, because I think that he’s feeling a little weird about that, and if the 21st century has taught us anything, it’s that there’s nothing weirdmaking that can’t be made even more weirdmaking by being broadcast on the Internet. So. Emilia got [...]

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This Love

June 20, 2010

… is unparalleled. Happy Father’s Day, you. ***** (And for my dad, best of men, always loved, always missed, this.)

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Bad Dad, Bad Dad, Whatcha Gonna Google?

October 27, 2009

I’m not sure what is funniest about this recent post at Salon: that Googling ‘bad fathering’ automatically prompts the suggestion that what one really wanted to search for was ‘bad mothering’ (because, as we all know, there are no bad fathers, just bad Google algorithms), or that the first time (ha!) this blog appears on [...]

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September 22, 2009

… is the luckiest number, when you’re counting years of love. In such a difficult year, your presence by my side has been the most cherished of gifts, the greatest of blessings. Love you so much.

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Heart Makes The Father, And The Man

June 21, 2009

Here is the paradox about parenthood and marriage: having children with the person you love gives you a bajillion new reasons to adore each other, a kerpillion new horizons towards which your hearts, together, can shoot, an infinity of moments over which your hearts can, together, explode into a burst of white-hot stars, but, too, [...]

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The Other Side Of Anger

February 4, 2009

Before I had children, I understood that parenthood would be challenging. I read a lot of books about it, actually, because I was a little worried. Would the first months of my child’s life be like boot camp? Would I go insane from sleep deprivation? Was I going to be comfortable breastfeeding? Would I gag [...]

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