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13 Apr

Taggy Taggerson and The Tagbots

Tagged, by Mrs. Chicky. Everyone else is doing it, right? (But if everyone else was jumping off of a bridge, sweetie…?) Must conform!

So. Six sorta weird, but completely random and mostly uninteresting things about me:

1) I was often told, when I was young, that I looked like Dana Plato. You know, that chick from Diff’rent Strokes who ended up a gun-toting drug addict? And died? That one. The resemblance stopped being interesting ‘round about the time she robbed the video store at gunpoint. But I hung onto those bangs for a long time.

2) I make up voices for my cats and have long, intense conversations with them about philosophy, rap music and reality TV shows, in which I use my own voice and then articulate their responses in the made-up voices. This has trailed off somewhat since the birth of WonderBaby, who is a more active conversational partner.

3) Oh, hey, funny story: I was once held against my will for two weeks on a Greek island by a weirdo who claimed to be in love with me. It ended when I was able to pick a lock to get into a room with a telephone and call my parents, who contacted the Greek authorities and Interpol. Then I escaped out a window, fled to safe-housing arranged by Interpol and was later smuggled onto a ferry in the middle of the night. I am not making this up.

4) I lived in Spain from the time I was 19 until I was 21, having bailed on University to become an autodidact and write the Great Canadian Novel (which, as it happened, I had no interest in writing in Canada.) I sat around parks and smoky bars in Barcelona writing angsty crap about how my Spanish boyfriend was a cheating liar, but gave that up after a while to become a triple-threat performer (Sing! Dance! Act!) in a touring bilingual musical theater troupe. I’m not making this up, either.

5) I have never actually broken up with a boyfriend. I ended relationships, but always did so passively-aggressively, by compelling them to break up with me (techniques ranged from the classic ‘distancing’ move – never returning phone calls – to arranging for them to be seduced while drunk by a slutty friend so that I could later have an outraged freak-out about their indiscretion and never see them again. Yes, I really did that.)

6) That cycle of evil ended – as did the more troubling cycle of evil that was my predilection for angsty writing – when I was barely into my twenties, around the time that I returned to Canada from Spain and met the future Bad Father. We met young and married young – does that count as weird? – and I am beyond grateful to God/the gods/Fortuna for having arranged that I grow up, into adulthood, with the most wonderful man in the world. Which reminds me…

The best, not-so-weird thing?

I have only been, and will only be, in love once. The day that I met the future Bad Father, I fell in love for the first and last time. And? Out of that love came WonderBaby. So…

7) I’m blessed.

(Or, to put it differently? Things turned out a hell of a lot better for me than they did for Dana Plato.)

So, I must now tag 6 unsuspecting bloggers…. hmm…. some of you have probably been tagged already, but what the hell…

1.) Jezer (Again! Because I know you love it! And we gotta keep the Jezer posts comin’!)
2.) Kristen
3.) Redneck Mommy
4.) chichimama
5.) kittenpie
6.) Sherry
7.) Urban Mommy (I know, your hands are full of newborn goodness, but ya gotta post something fun before you get down to sharing the grim details of the Mother of all Bad Weekends.)

If you’re reading this, and I haven’t tagged you, and you haven’t been tagged yet by someone else, consider yourself tagged. But note well: if you choose to accept this mission, the RULES, below, apply to you.

So, yeah, rules. ‘Cause you know that you’re not really having fun until someone busts out some RULES:

1.) Tell us six weird things about yourself. (I broke this rule. Why? Because it’s my blog and sometimes I like to go a little W.I.L.D. here.)
2.) Come back here and let me know when you’ve completed the tag so that I can come over and giggle/chortle/comment/etc.
3.) Tag 6 more bloggers. (OK, I broke this rule, too. I got carried away. It’s tag, dudes!)
4.) Let those people know that you’ve tagged them.

I think that’s it. I’m gonna go try to get drunk now. Wish me luck.