More from the Shameless Whoring Files…

September 18, 2006

EDIT (huzzah!) – a question and new picture added, below…

… because I just cannot get enough of myself, and neither can you…

1) More what-the-fuck-is-up-with-feminism? ranting at SheBytches. If you are offended by my drooling girl love for Gloria Steinem, look away. Otherwise, good times.

2) My own Call to Action post is up. But hey! Not here! I put it up at urbanmoms, where the notion of blog community and the integrity thereof has been under rigorous interrogation.

(Hey! There can’t be community where there’s advertising! Not possible! Whatchoo talkin’ ’bout, Bad Mother?)

(Ever been to Cuba? The absence of Pepsi ads has secured freedom of speech and open dialogue to an extent hitherto unseen in human history.)

The Call to Action links are being compiled as we speak and that post will go up, in all of its gushy/ranty goodness SOON. I promise.

3) That ‘Loneliness of the Long-Distance Mommy’ post that I wrote the other week? Devra and Aviva over at Parentopia have deconstructed it and de-guiltified it and their work is awesome, not least because they turned my appropriation of Liz’s term Competi-Mommy into the term Emanci-Mommy. Genius.

4) That’s it, for now. What, you’re not tired of my screeching, whorish voice yet? How about a little WonderBaby/INEBG Dancers action to take the edge off?


… to get ahead in life…

… you gotta step on a little frog.


So, um… everyone is all, oh, poor Kermie (and even one cheery I’d rather Fozzie took the foot to the head!), but has no-one noticed that the baby is using Kermie’s head to leverage herself up to the second shelf of our bookshelf unit, the better to pull herself up to the third shelf and turn on the television?

Or is this normal baby behaviour, and I just missed that chapter in What to Expect in the First Year?

Things she didn’t learn at play group, #837: WonderBaby demonstrates how to break out of one’s own house through the living room window…

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    nonlineargirl September 19, 2006 at 12:49 am

    Oh poor frog. Please remind him that you always step on the ones you love.

    Mommy off the Record September 19, 2006 at 3:49 am

    Ah, how I love those froggy pictures!

    If you still have room for one more link, here is my call to action post. Thanks, HBM!

    Mamalooper September 19, 2006 at 7:07 am

    I did my call to action post too!


    penelopeto September 19, 2006 at 8:13 am

    Um, do you mind that the thing that excites me the most about this post is the photographic suggestion that your house is as messy as mine? (at least until the baby goes to sleep)

    Great pics, and thanks for the links.

    Jenny September 19, 2006 at 8:26 am

    Miss Piggy would be so pissed off.

    Lisa b September 19, 2006 at 8:29 am

    Wonderbaby always says it best.

    Queue September 19, 2006 at 8:33 am

    Dude he is so doing a raindance on Kermit!! That totally ROCKS!!!! Totally!!

    Her Bad Mother September 19, 2006 at 8:45 am

    Penelope, I can pretty much guarantee you that my house is MESSIER than yours. And it stays that way after the baby goes to sleep.

    Queue – Hello! WonderBaby, although sparse of hair and given to wearing brown pants and stripes a la Charlie Brown, is a she. But she’ll take the kudos either way.

    radioactive girl September 19, 2006 at 9:16 am

    You have such an adorable baby. Sadly, I think *my* house is messier than yours, but I do have 4 kids so maybe that’s ok?

    Mir September 19, 2006 at 9:25 am

    Okay, that last picture? WonderBaby looks like she was CLONED from you. Spitting image. So beautiful.

    mothergoosemouse September 19, 2006 at 9:32 am

    Those EYES.

    Will do the assigned reading later today when I have no other distractions besides a filthy house and the siren songs of the Ethan Allen and Calico Corners websites.

    urbanmoms September 19, 2006 at 10:00 am

    I love the look on WonderBaby’s face! A little guilty but oh so proud!! Those big blue eyes must be very hard to say no to.

    T. September 19, 2006 at 10:00 am

    Wonderbaby has a tuft of hair! Amazing!

    Although, I’ve always liked Kermit. I rather thought Fozzy bear was the one who could use a good stepping on.

    Thanks for the reading material. My librarian is not going to be pleased. She would much rather see me read a book than a screen. I keep telling her you are so much more interesting. Perhaps I will have to introduce her to Wonderbaby, the Kermit Killing Kid.

    kfk September 19, 2006 at 11:25 am

    Too damn cute! Gotta love that smirk.

    sunshine scribe September 19, 2006 at 11:36 am

    Will show my guy the photos of his fiesty young girlfriend when he gets home tonight … he’ll be giggling for sure.

    Just read your SheBytches post. Here Here. Can you hear me accross town cheering you on?!? I am.

    And um… … very cool – looking forward to following it. Smart smart smart.

    S :)

    Mary-LUE September 19, 2006 at 12:50 pm

    I read this originally through Bloglines without pictures and thought I was missing something with the frog reference. Is there some saying I’m not aware of? Is she insulting the French? Why?

    Now I see!

    gingajoy September 19, 2006 at 2:20 pm

    “Back the fuck off of Gloria!”

    You know, that description of your sardonic smoking, DM wearing self–that was me too. (only platforms and hotpants). A “post” feminist who took pleasure in desconstructing “essentialism” and “privileged feminist discourse” and touted my identity politics left right and center. It was all about who could speak, and who could not speak for women.

    While I still think we need to examine who gets to speak, and scrutinize claims made for “all women,” if all we do is examine our “theoretical bases” we end up paralyzed. Activism means taking a stand, making claims, fighting.

    So yes, I too shamefacedly reclaim Steinem and all those other “aging feminists (ouch!)”

    This does not have to be about exclusion. Right now it’s about making the conversation relevant on a wider scene again.

    Lisa b September 19, 2006 at 2:36 pm

    I just had to come back and say I loooved the SheBytches post. I agree that where you are with your discussion of issues of privilege changes with your life situation. I am still offended at the insinuation that you have not or do not think about this. It is absurd to me that someone doing a Phd in political science would not. Of course your response is far more eloqent than mine. I just want to cut right to “back the fuck off…” which is why I have been unable to write anything at urbanmoms. I feel bad about that.

    Mom101 September 19, 2006 at 5:06 pm

    The Cuba line just made me laugh – nay, GUFFAW – better than any other line regarding this whole discussion. That should pretty much end it, no?

    Off to the bytch site

    Anonymous September 19, 2006 at 5:29 pm

    I am just scouting around all the stuff you wrote about lately.. (Sorry, I am a little late to the party)…from advertising to feminist talk with Gloria Steinem…wow! Alot to focus on.
    Luv the pics of Wonderbaby :)

    Pattie September 19, 2006 at 5:31 pm

    Sorry, that was me “anonymous” above..don’t know how that happened!

    metro mama September 19, 2006 at 6:47 pm

    Love what you wrote at SheBytches.

    The new site is looking good!

    You’re gonna have your hands full with WonderBaby…you already do.

    Queen of Spain September 19, 2006 at 6:51 pm

    Yeah. I don’t get it either. I mean, ads on my site automatically makes me an outcast? Do I no longer have anything good to say, because my sidebar changed?

    Eh. F’ em all.

    Queen of Spain September 19, 2006 at 6:52 pm

    Oh. And very jealous I didn’t get a Greenstone invite. I mean…I did radio for a dozen years. Put in a good word for me, would ya? I think I’m still low on the traffic counters, so I don’t get many emails…

    sniff sniff sniff

    Mother Bumper September 19, 2006 at 8:19 pm

    Shameless Whoring Files” okay woman, you crack me up. Whore away, I say!

    Um, how cute is WB in that outfit? She’s like a bad ass rugby star kicking Kerm’s butt.

    Her Bad Mother September 19, 2006 at 9:13 pm

    Okay, has no-one noticed that WonderBaby is CLIMBING THE BOOKSHELVES in those photos? That she is TWO SHELVES UP?

    Or is this normal for babies? Do all babies use their frogs to get a leg up and scale bookshelves to turn on televisions?

    Did I miss something in that What To Expect in the First Year book?

    Jill September 19, 2006 at 10:29 pm

    It’s not easy being green. They don’t call her WonderBaby for nuthin’.

    ephelba September 19, 2006 at 10:32 pm

    She will use stacked boxes or opened drawers next. Just you watch. Are your shelves screwed into the wall with the little safety thingys? You’ll want those.
    Just wait till she figures out she can shove one thing over to another to use it for a stool. It’s all over but the yellin.

    dorothy September 19, 2006 at 10:39 pm

    Just preparing her for corporate America, my friend…

    Mayberry September 19, 2006 at 11:05 pm

    Yes. The toddlers, they climb. At 15 months, I caught my son standing triumphantly atop the kitchen table. I don’t know why that’s not in the book.

    kittenpie September 19, 2006 at 11:27 pm

    oh god you are in some trouble, woman…

    Pumpkinpie experimented with this some, but once she conquered stuff and there wasn’t much exciting stuff to find up there, she kind of stopped bothering – most of the time. You can hope!

    mothergoosemouse September 19, 2006 at 11:32 pm

    Holy shit a brick Cath.

    People are giving you crap because Ms. Steinem is WHITE? And RICH?

    WTF? Who the hell DOESN’T want to be rich?

    Point them my way and I’ll call bullshit on them. Money doesn’t solve everything, but it sure does make choices easier.

    And she’s white? So WHAT?

    Let’s hear some actual discussion on that topic. Let’s see who actually has the cojones to criticize Ms. Steinem on the basis of her ethnicity.

    (Yeah, finally got around to the assigned reading.)

    IzzyMom September 20, 2006 at 12:22 am

    Oy! I have lots of catching up to do around here. And the links! I’ll never be able to read them all!

    Sooo…I’m just going to skip to the very most important niblet of news I read this go ’round and that is Ms. Wonderbaby’s walking!

    Yahooo for WB!

    May her newfound mode of upright transport not morph into crazy mad furniture scaling skillz anytime soon because, I swear to God, it ages you prematurely.

    Props on all the good stuff that’s happening and high fives for finding the fricken time to blog about all of it. Don’t know HOW you do it!


    Lady M September 20, 2006 at 12:51 am

    Break free, WonderBaby! Although I’m sure she doesn’t realize that the nice pampered life she leads wouldn’t last long if she really made it out the window.

    We’re taking Q to a baby “gymnastics” class now so that he can get out his climbing urges somewhere padded. I’m not sure it was a good idea. Now he gets to practice his skills and then come home to tackle more challenging terrain.

    Thanks for the excellent rants and links.

    lildb September 20, 2006 at 12:54 am

    your daughter is a genius, but more to the point, she’s a wily one. better keep on eye (or several; maybe borrow Kermit’s, ’cause they’re rolly) on that girl.

    and when I say, keep an eye on that girl, I mean that in the future sense. as in, I have a feeling she’s going places. not some sad-sack advice to be sure to watch your child closely as she mounts all the furniture in your house. I don’t believe in advice.

    the end. :p

    Queso September 20, 2006 at 1:44 am

    I love the shameless whoring. Great reads.

    Mrs. Chicky September 20, 2006 at 10:29 am

    Do you think you could bring Wonderbaby over here to step all over Elmo? That little red monster is driving me crazy.

    bubandpie September 20, 2006 at 10:59 am

    He he. I was too distracted by wondering if that nice shirt came from Old Navy to realize what she was actually DOING. And now that I’ve taken a second look – I think you and I have the same surround-sound receiver.

    chelle September 20, 2006 at 11:20 am

    Go WonderBaby GO! hehe! I adore the climbing and adventurous spirit!

    Jenn September 20, 2006 at 12:36 pm

    We have a CLIMBER!!!!

    crazymumma September 20, 2006 at 12:44 pm

    The violence and cruelty of small children to their play things never ceases to amaze me. My littlest is positively homicidal.

    Ever watched kids with a pinata? Totally Lord of the Flies.
    Poor Kermit.

    Binkytown September 20, 2006 at 4:08 pm

    my goodness HBM. Just when I think you’ve outdone yourself you go and pull another blog out of your bag of tricks. You are a blogging goddess force to be reckoned with. Well done!

    Jenny September 20, 2006 at 6:39 pm

    Totally normal. At that age Hailey was climbing onto the speakers in order to open and close the DVD player…repeatedly.

    T. September 20, 2006 at 9:08 pm

    I didn’t say I’d rather see Fozzie take one to the head. I said he needed a good stepping on. Jeez. You make me sound well, like a redneck.

    As for climbing, did I not tell you about the time my 16 month old daughter went missing. I searched the whole house for her. Guess where I found her.

    On TOP of the refrigerator. With her hand (literally) in the cookie jar. Fun times, Catherine, fun times.

    That story had a good ending. I won’t tell you about the one where my son climbed up the dresser, fell down and got six stitches and a broken collar bone. At 18 months…

    Rose September 21, 2006 at 12:15 am

    Smart little one you have there. LOL Just wait untill she’s 16 and she’s climbing out her bedroom window. LOL

    creative-Type Dad (Tony) September 21, 2006 at 1:26 am

    Kermit makes an appearance, again. I love it!

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