Jockstrap Mondays

February 18, 2008

I am spectacularly, hormonally cranky today. You don’t want to be anywhere near me, because I guarantee you that you will not be able to say the right thing. Just ask my husband. This mood has been going on for two days now, and I think that he’s considering wearing both earplugs and a jockstrap. You know, to protect the vulnerable parts.

So, there is just no readable prose forthcoming from me today. Or, probably, tomorrow. Unless you count the mocking of celebrity penises readable prose. In which case, you’re in luck – I’ve had a lot to say about celebrity penises of late.

(If you are easily offended or weak of stomach or in the presence of small children, do not click on the first two of the above links. Just don’t. I warned you.)

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    { 23 comments }

    liv February 18, 2008 at 6:34 pm

    OH, C, I had to look….and yet! you’re naughty! and yet, i love it! i mean, LURVE it, you gloriously hormonally pent up woman! rage on!

    (how’s that for most exclamation points ever?!)

    Maddy February 18, 2008 at 7:36 pm

    Well that sounds like a dare! I’ll have to go and see how truly weak I am.
    Cheers

    Aimee Greeblemonkey February 18, 2008 at 7:51 pm

    That photo is forever burned into the back of my eyeballs.

    And when your hubby is done with the jockstrap, maybe he can send it to mine. Oh wait. I think you aren’t supposed to share such things.

    ewe are here February 18, 2008 at 7:55 pm

    Ack! I clicked. Ack!

    How will I ever sleep again?

    flutter February 18, 2008 at 8:43 pm

    MY EYES!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    I was referring to Juliette Lewis’s hair, of course….

    gwendomama February 18, 2008 at 9:45 pm

    EUW.
    nightmare material, that. thanks though – for the warning. that was fair.

    since you are pissed off and talking about celebrity penises, you should probably pick a fight with someone about your baby’s penis and it’s intact-ness or not.

    you know. for pissed off penis fun.

    Liz@thisfullhouse.com February 18, 2008 at 10:00 pm

    Ack, you had me at “Just don’t!”

    Heather February 18, 2008 at 10:18 pm

    Gah! That’s just plain wrong!

    Redneck Mommy February 18, 2008 at 10:51 pm

    I’m a tad grumpy myself tonight thanks to two children who won’t stop arguing and the law says I can’t strangle them…

    Maybe a few small penises will cheer me up…

    Jozet at Halushki February 19, 2008 at 12:17 am

    Uhhhh.

    I’m envisioning a porno version of Lord of the Rings with Danny as the naughty Hobbit, Dildo Baggins.

    Thanks for that.

    motherbumper February 19, 2008 at 8:40 am

    Always with the teeny bits! You have no shame. That’s why you are my buddy.

    furiousBall February 19, 2008 at 10:42 am

    Dear you lady,

    you owe me a keyboard for making me spit coffee all over da place.

    Grim Reality Girl February 19, 2008 at 12:44 pm

    What has been seen can not be unseen… I was warned, I should not have clicked that link…..

    Law Student Hot Mama February 19, 2008 at 1:43 pm

    Um . . . I’d like to check up on the Brad Pitt allegations for myself.

    mothergoosemouse February 19, 2008 at 3:34 pm

    Wanna come over and sniff some Grey Goose?

    caramama February 19, 2008 at 3:48 pm

    I just can’t do it! I can’t click over! Especially after reading the comments! I will forever lack the knowledge of what you all are exclaiming over.

    As for hormonal, I was a mess my entire pregnancy! I crazy lady mess! I hope you are getting the crazy happy moods as well as the angry and sad moods. :-)

    Miss Britt February 19, 2008 at 4:37 pm

    Everyone needs a niche. ;-)

    Lydia February 19, 2008 at 5:11 pm

    The crankiness has come south, because today I could KILL someone. I’m not picky. Anyone who crosses me.

    This pregnancy stuff is getting old.

    Mom101 February 19, 2008 at 10:33 pm

    PENIS!

    *I just wanted to say that because often a good PENIS! outburst can do wonders for the crankiness.

    Staci Schoff February 20, 2008 at 1:48 am

    At first I thought the Bonaduce one was the old Burt Reynolds when he posed for Playboy (hello, does that date me???). Eeewwwww!

    iheartchocolate February 20, 2008 at 10:21 am

    I can’t do it! I wanted to, but I can’t.

    Such a wimp.

    Carmen February 20, 2008 at 7:09 pm

    Check out the latest post on Mom101…the “anatomically correct” boy baby she talks about is still more well-endowed than Bonaduce. Sad, but true…

    Pgoodness February 21, 2008 at 12:15 am

    dude. ewww. seriously, bonaduce? I think I just threw up a little in my mouth! hehe

    and Brad Pitt…well, are we really going to go by anything Juliette Lewis has to say?! LOL.

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