sleep

It is very important, when you are staying up after your bedtime so that you can be awake when Mommy gets home, even though Mommy is having trouble getting home, and it is getting very late, it is very important that you know how to tell when you are sleepy, and when you are not, because then you can explain it, so that everyone understands, and no-one will accidentally put you to bed, because that would ruin all of your plans for staying up and giving Mommy the present that you made for her, which is a picture of a great big orange heart, inside which you’ve listed all the things – candy, cake, juice, straws, marshmallows and (for her) coffee (which you spell KOFFY) – that you need her to buy at the grocery store as soon as it opens in the morning. So.

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Icarus Didn’t Have Sleep Problems

January 12, 2010

I’m not even going to joke about the gods any more. They clearly regard my ambitions to master sleep as akin to donning wings and taking aim at the sun, and every time I speak out loud about those ambitions they smite me. Pride, apparently, really does goeth before a fall, and seeing as the [...]

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Psst, Shhh, Hey: WE’RE SLEEPING

January 11, 2010

The boy is sleeping in his own bed. The boy is sleeping in his own bed. THE BOY. IS SLEEPING. IN HIS OWN BED. And I’m not even afraid of incurring the wrath of the sleep gods by saying so. Well, mostly not. I may need to sacrifice some stuffed barnyard creature as a precautionary [...]

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Next Time, I’m Keeping My Mouth Shut.

December 4, 2009

I knew that the gods smite for lesser things than overt celebrations of toddlers sleeping through the night. I knew this, and yet I celebrated. And sure enough, the gods, they smote, and Jasper woke and woke and woke again and ended up, once more, attached to my head in the dark hours before the [...]

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Praise The Sleep Gods And Pass The Cookies

December 3, 2009

OH SWEET LORD HE SLEPT THROUGH THE NIGHT. (please gods don’t smite me for celebrating this. please please please and thank you.)

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To Sleep, Perchance To Have Some Small Person Yank The Hairs Out Of Your Head

December 1, 2009

I have a confession to make: when I said that I was giving up on any kind of sleep training, I meant it, but I was also kind of hoping in, some small dark corner of my heart, that ‘giving up’ would be the magic bullet and that by ‘giving up’ I would be making [...]

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Go Tell The Spartans

November 30, 2009

I give up. I surrender. The battle has been fought. It has been lost. We have tried everything, pretty much, to get Jasper to stay asleep in his own bed. Which is to say, we have tried everything within the limits of our physical and emotional endurance. We made a final push this weekend, a [...]

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Boot Skootin’ Snot Boogerin’ Nobody’s Sleepin’ Boogie

November 19, 2009

This is what 6am looks like at our house: saggy diapers and ukeleles and big, snot-smeared hugs. It’s also what 8pm, 11pm, and 3am look like. Yes, he sleeps in those cowboy boots. No, not for any longer than two or three hours at a time.

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The Grabbing Hands, Grab All They Can

November 4, 2009

Things are getting desperate around here. Like, really. I can’t remember the last time I slept more than two or three hours at a stretch. I had hoped that my brief trip to Chicago would provide a full night’s sleep, but, alas, I spent that night waking up every hour wondering why I wasn’t being [...]

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And On The Seven-Hundred And Second Day, She Took It All Back

March 1, 2009

What I wrote the other day? About sleep? Please disregard. The gods, they were listening, and they did not approve. That, or you all weren’t making the necessary sacrifices on my behalf. Which I understand, sort of, because good sheets (the sleep gods’ preferred object of sacrifice) are a thing to treasure, but still. We’re [...]

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