Psst, Shhh, Hey: WE’RE SLEEPING

January 11, 2010

The boy is sleeping in his own bed. The boy is sleeping in his own bed. THE BOY. IS SLEEPING. IN HIS OWN BED.

And I’m not even afraid of incurring the wrath of the sleep gods by saying so. Well, mostly not. I may need to sacrifice some stuffed barnyard creature as a precautionary measure, and I am certainly going to be knocking any all things wood-derived and I’m going to keep the victorious fist-pumps to a minimum until we’ve got this sleep thing conquered, but -  let’s all keep our voices down here – I’m pretty sure that we can conquer it, the wrath of the gods notwithstanding.

Because we have a strategy now. We have help.  A lovely woman who goes by the superhero handle of The Sleep Doula offered me advice and assistance and it is working and I am so desperately grateful and thankful and hopeful that I’m pretty sure the happy-beams can seen from space.

That’s all that I’m going to say for now – I’m not so unafraid of the sleep gods that I’m willing to wave my middle finger at them while telling them exactly how we’re managing to do this without their help and chortling  oh hai sleep gods: SUCK IT because, you know, that sort of thing provokes them – but I promise that once we’ve got this sleep thing mostly sorted out – because you know that it’s only ever mostly – I’ll share the story of what we did and how it worked, exactly. (Okay. I might share a few details in the comments, if you ask nicely and you promise to whisper. Quietly. The gods, they have big ears.)


I’m working up to sharing my own ghost/angel/messages-from-beyond story/ies. Because, yes, I have them, but I’ve been shy/embarrassed/emotionally overcome about sharing them. But your stories -and, yes, your counter-stories and reflections on the absence of a beyond – have been such a help to me, such balm for my heart and soul, that I’m no longer afraid to go there. Thank you. (So insufficient, ‘thank you’, but it comes straight from the very deepest part of my heart. THANK YOU.)


This weekend in My Year Of Believing Dangerously: to go to church, or not to go to church? That is the really, really difficult question. Coming up: reading Montaigne, The Little Prince and the tops of cereal boxes.


I wanted to make a joke about Big Swinging Dicks at this post, but it seemed somewhat inappropriate.

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    T January 11, 2010 at 12:00 pm

    Ohhh, I can’t wait to hear the details of how you accomplished transitioning the boy to his own bed. We are in sleep hell with our boy. Lots of wakings and he comes into our bed in the wee hours of the morning. I look forward to any advice that may help us! I hope the sleep gods do not rear their ugly heads. I will be knocking on wood and throwing up my middle finger to them as well!

    Her Bad Mother January 11, 2010 at 1:02 pm

    Our problem with Jasper was exactly that – coming into our bed. The Sleep Doula’s advice was, in part, to acknowledge his attachment needs – so no CIO. Basically, respond to his needs at a remove (talk to him, but don’t go into his room and pick him up.)

    julie@MommySaidWhat? January 11, 2010 at 12:06 pm

    OK, from everyone else you left in the dirt, I’m begging you – how’d you do it? Every time I think I’ve got this sleep thing licked, that girl throws another curve ball at me.

    And of course, CONGRATS! What a huge relief. Now you need to learn how to sleep again, right?
    .-= julie@MommySaidWhat?´s last blog ..OK =-.

    Her Bad Mother January 11, 2010 at 1:06 pm

    It’s a kind of modified response – when he calls/hollers, we *don’t* pick him up, don’t even go into his room. We reassure him from outside – he can’t see us, just hear us.

    Mama in the City January 11, 2010 at 12:38 pm

    This will be a moment/milestone that you will not forget! I lost count after night 20 for us but was doing a sleep dance every night before that. It is amazing and wonderful once they figure out that sleep actually can rock (and especially rock all in your own bed!). Now I have, no lie, a boy who actually asks to go to bed or have a nap. Amazing since we had previously been in total sleep hell.
    .-= Mama in the City´s last blog ..What’s Cooking Ben? =-.

    Her Bad Mother January 11, 2010 at 1:07 pm

    We’ve been without sleep for nearly 20 MONTHS. This is HUGE for us.

    Kimberly January 11, 2010 at 12:39 pm

    Oh please share a little bit! We have a one year old who wakes up between 7-9 times a night. AND I have a 3 1/2 year old, so I can’t just flake out during the day. But we are exhausted even though we go to be as SOON AS THE KIDS! Sheesh. Happy it is workign for you.


    Her Bad Mother January 11, 2010 at 1:10 pm

    What I said above (and will repeat as often as I need to, adding details where I can): responding to our waking monster *minimally*. Ignoring him doesn’t work/hasn’t worked. So we respond in a limited way – just talking to him through his door, reassuring him that we’re still here, that he can go back to sleep. Meets his attachment needs somewhat while still avoiding us caving in to those needs ;)

    Keli Maye January 11, 2010 at 2:09 pm

    I envy you. Our little sleep monster is now two and a half and STILL doesn’t sleep through the night. CIO doesn’t work; he will scream for up to two hours straight (=still no sleep for us), with breaks for vomiting. Even when I have cut out night-nursing, he continues to wake up, every night, at the same times, and to pester myself and my husband. My friends with kids who sleep are very condescending about it the whole thing, which makes me feel bad. I feel even worse about the fact that I lose my temper from exhaustion at least a few times a month and wind up yelling at the kid in the middle of the night.

    Um…I guess that was more of a rant than a real comment. But anyway, I am happy to hear you are escaping from the ranks of the sleep-deprived!

    Her Bad Mother January 11, 2010 at 3:20 pm

    what we’re doing might work for you – check out my responses to some of the other comments. we’re basically responding but NOT going so far as to go in to his room. So, lurking outside his door and talking him down from his freak-outs from there, letting him know we’re there, close, but that we’re not coming in.

    Jasper totally reacted the way you describe to our few efforts with CIO – he just escalated. So the sleep doula said we need to respond in some way to him – he needs reassurance – but to not cave in to him entirely. Seems to be working so far!

    Keli Maye January 11, 2010 at 6:37 pm

    Problem: he just comes right the heck out of his bed and out of his bedroom. (And he finds being unable to leave his room a mix of terrifying and infuriating, i.e., insta-tantrum time!) We know he’s woken up when he comes into our room, already howling. Frankly, at this point, we just go ahead and start with him in our own bed most nights. It reduces the amount of time we have to spend calming him down so he’s able to fall back asleep again.

    Her Bad Mother January 11, 2010 at 8:27 pm

    We tried ONCE to get Jasper into toddler bed, and he just would NOT stay in it. So back to the crib he went. We’re now not so keen on doing the crib-to-bed transition until a) he’s not inclined to bolt, or b) we can get a toddler bed with fencing.

    Her Bad Mother January 11, 2010 at 3:21 pm

    Also – I know EXACTLY how you feel about feeling badly – I was too tired to play with my kids, and so tired that there was too much temper-losing. Sleep-deprivation SUCKS.

    Natballs January 11, 2010 at 2:12 pm

    Oh god, I just bought the No Cry Sleep Solution and I logged how many times my little man woke me up Saturday night…. THIRTEEN TIMES. THIRTEEN. Please, let me know your secret.
    .-= Natballs´s last blog ..Five Months =-.

    Her Bad Mother January 11, 2010 at 3:16 pm

    We don’t go into his room. We hunker at his door when he wakes, talking to him, reassuring him, letting him know we’re near, but we DON’T go in.The idea is to get him accustomed to idea of being alone at night by reassuring him that he’s not actually alone, that we’re not far, that he doesn’t need to be in our bed to feel safe.

    Christy January 11, 2010 at 2:21 pm

    I don’t want to anger the sleep gods, but do you think it helped that you stopped breastfeeding? We are going on 19 months with very wakeful sleep, and I’m tired. I might need to solve the mommy as pacifier issue first. It’s hard to ignore hysterical crying, so I like the minimally responsive idea.

    Her Bad Mother January 11, 2010 at 3:14 pm

    Even though this is a terrible thing for a lactivist-type to say, it DID help me – we stopped some months ago, but I don’t think I’d be able to get him out of our bed NOW if we were still nursing – he’s pretty attachment-oriented, and he was pretty fanatic about his booby. At least now he associates things other than my boobs as sources of comfort, which makes it easier, I think, for him to cope with not sleeping with us (which he has only done twice now, but still.)

    That said, if he were still nursing but not needing a night feeding or so attached to the boob as a source of comfort, he might have done okay. Depends on the child, I guess.

    Bella January 11, 2010 at 2:33 pm

    YEAH!!! Congratulations… (I’m only saying for getting THIS far, so I can’t be angering the sleep gods, could I?).

    Also? The Sleep Doula rocks and I LOVE that she’s in our fair city.
    .-= Bella´s last blog ..The US edition of Bedtiming is HERE! =-.

    Her Bad Mother January 11, 2010 at 3:22 pm

    She is a total blessing and then some ;)

    Sugared Harpy January 11, 2010 at 2:47 pm

    Oh wow, whoohoooo!
    .-= Sugared Harpy´s last blog ..Shhhh….I think things are better =-.

    T January 11, 2010 at 2:59 pm

    Conrats again on the sleep thing. I have a follow up question…because I’m desperate. When you stood outside his door to reassure him, how long did you have to be there? How long did it take to settle him down?

    Her Bad Mother January 11, 2010 at 3:09 pm

    The first night (two nights ago), I’d say fifteen minutes, max. My husband put some pillows on the floor and got comfortable ;) The second night, just a few minutes.

    The Sleep Doula told us, though, to prepare for however long it took. The important thing was that he hear us and know we were there, that he wasn’t alone, so that he might settle for getting comfort from that rather than from being brought to bed with us ;)

    Ironic Mom January 11, 2010 at 3:01 pm


    I’ve been lucky that my twins are good sleepers. When they were 13 months old, though, we moved from Bangkok to Canada, which meant a 12-hour time change. I was used to having kids who slept through the night; suddenly, I was on the other side of the sleep problem (not to mention the other side of the world). With my husband’s support, I committed to patting their bum when they cried but not picking them up, nursing, or whatever. Each cry, I’d leave them for longer. The first night one (or both – can’t remember now) of my twins screamed for an hour. Next night was 10 minutes. Next night 1. Then no more waking. Now, I’m not arrogant enough to say this’ll work for all babies; my statistical sample of two is hardly scientific. But I thought I’d share my story in case it might help or encourage even one mom.

    Here’s to sleep!
    .-= Ironic Mom´s last blog ..5 Resolutions Made by a 5-Year-Old =-.

    Her Bad Mother January 11, 2010 at 4:55 pm

    It might not work for all babies – it didn’t work for Jasper – but it will for some. That’s the trick with sleep – all babies are not the same (Emilia, our eldest, slept/sleeps like a champ. Jasper, well… you know the story.)

    What we’re doing with J is a kind of modified version of this – we just don’t go in to him. (Can’t go in to him – he sees us and freaks out ;) )

    T January 11, 2010 at 3:30 pm

    Wow! 15 minutes. That’s fantastic. My son screams for hours (yes plural, 2+) in the middle of the night. His persistence will serve him well as an adult, but for now it’s killing me. ;) Thanks for sharing your tips.

    Erin January 11, 2010 at 4:22 pm

    re: the issue of night nursing – I have to say, every story from a nursing mother of a toddler I know who night nurses also has a child who doesn’t sleep through the night. The connection between night nursing and frequent wakening seems clear to me. Obviously, all children are different from each other, but nightweaning really does seem to a be a common magic bullet. We nightweaned at 8 1/2 months and he magically started sleeping through the night. Of course he was a relatively easy child to wean. But I want to stress that nightweaning did not spell the end of our nursing relationship – I nursed him to 18 months.

    That said his 18 month sleep regression has been kicking our butts. The ped said the same thing as the sleep doula – during the 18-22 month sleep regression CIO generally does not work, because their separation anxiety is so high. We’ll have to try HBM’s method and see how it works!

    Keli Maye January 11, 2010 at 6:47 pm

    Just to make your data muddier, I did night-wean my toddler son for a while. It did not effect his sleep-pattern. He continued to wake up (and wake me up) at the times he had usually woken to nurse. Instead of fussing about boob, he would insist that I stroke his head for 5-10 minutes straight. I quit doing that, too, and he would wake up, wake me up, fuss briefly, then lie in the dark, awake and wide-eyed for a while, intermittently poking me or talking to me.

    Eventually, I gave in and went back to night-nursing him. Rolling over and sticking the boob in his mouth for a few minutes netted me more sleep! Nowadays I make a deal with him: he can nurse for two minutes if he will roll over and go back to sleep afterwords. This mostly works, but still means I get woken up 2-3 times a night. I miss sleeping.

    Her Bad Mother January 12, 2010 at 2:28 pm

    End of the day, night-weaning and even weaning didn’t solve our sleep problems with Jasper (obviously). So. FWIW.

    Lindsay January 11, 2010 at 10:15 pm

    My toddler (19 mos) has been night-weaned for 6 months. He still wakes up AT LEAST 3 times a night.

    Pamela January 11, 2010 at 4:40 pm

    So, if he was coming to your bed, does that mean he’s no longer in a crib? I feel like we are doing OK because kid is still confined behind bars, so to speak, but our troubles with #1 happened when he could crawl out of the crib. Worry we’re going to experience the same with #2. (BTW, #1 is STILL sleeping in our bed, but it is not big enough for the whole family!) When did you transition him from crib to bed?
    .-= Pamela´s last blog ..Homemade Toffee: Christmas Tradition =-.

    Her Bad Mother January 11, 2010 at 4:48 pm

    No, he’s still in his crib. I don’t know how well this would work if he could walk around freely ;)

    Accidents January 11, 2010 at 6:10 pm

    Now I know it’s the Sleep Doula who is the expert, and I don’t mean to turn you into one after 2 days of fledgling success…but: what’s your opinion of the “vocal reassurance but not going in” method with a younger child? My boy is about 11 months, and sleeps like a newborn most of the time, and we’re dying of exhaustion. I wonder if he is cognitively able to find comfort in my voice and NOT my arms/breasts. Opinion(s)?
    .-= Accidents´s last blog ..[Inter]National Delurking Week, 2010! =-.

    Her Bad Mother January 11, 2010 at 8:09 pm

    I’ll check in with Ms. Doula and see if she can answer your question ;)

    Sleep Doula January 12, 2010 at 1:44 pm

    Hi Accidents and others,
    I use this technique with a variety of ages with modifications made based on parenting style and child personality. We all(young and old) do well with support. At 11 months he will take comfort in your voice that being said I am sure his preference would be to be in your arms or on breast. Have confidence in your child’s abilitys and in your self you both can do it. As I dont have alot of time to respond on blogs for the other person who asked if this technique works as well for a child who uses the breast as comfort at night, it can. Hope you all have sweet dreams. Time for my nap, working with another toddler tonight.

    Her Bad Mother January 12, 2010 at 2:52 pm

    Thanks, Sleep Doula!!!

    caramama January 13, 2010 at 6:02 pm

    For what it’s worth, we are working on our 7 month old’s sleep by going in and reassuring him with our voices and presence. He can see us, which I think works better at a younger age when they don’t quite get the concept of someone existing where they can’t see (does that make sense?). We are going in every 5 minutes and talking to him a bit and rubbing him. He seems to get more upset when we leave than he was before we went in, but then he calms way down.

    Anyway, my point is that going in but not picking up, rathering that reassuring from outside the door, might work for the younger crowd.

    Then again, it might not. It did NOT work for my daughter (now almost 3). Pretty much nothing works for her.
    .-= caramama´s last blog ..Question of the Week – Mommy and Me Activities =-.

    Jana January 11, 2010 at 7:33 pm

    Ah, sweet sleep. You know, Al is still in our bed, but we’re OK with that. It was pretty much the only way we ever got any sleep at the beginning, and I’m *still* not willing to mess around with that.
    .-= Jana´s last blog ..Kickin’ It Old School =-.

    Her Bad Mother January 11, 2010 at 8:10 pm

    If Jasper didn’t grab my hair and wrestle my head while he slept, I’d be okay with him sleeping with us. But I just got NO SLEEP that way. 20 months. NO SLEEP.

    I’ll give up cuddles for sleep.

    Carol January 11, 2010 at 8:25 pm

    I’m sooooo jealous, and happy for you! My daughter was 11 before she slept alone. We tried everything, nothing worked, we just lost inches of height due to curling up in a toddler bed trying to get her to go to sleep. Without fail the parent putting her to sleep would wake up in the morning alone, in the toddler bed while little girl slept spread out in the big bed with her other parent. She’s 16, I still can’t walk fully upright.

    Her Bad Mother January 12, 2010 at 2:55 pm

    I’ve lost chunks of hair. I feel your pain.

    Zak January 11, 2010 at 9:11 pm

    We had my son in his crib and then he turned two and figured out how to get out of it.

    And now every night bedtime is tears and fighting.

    He is sleeping with us and now we aren’t sleeping, see kicks to the face, hair pulling and tossing and turning.
    .-= Zak´s last blog ..Pack It Up, Pack It In =-.

    Her Bad Mother January 12, 2010 at 2:54 pm

    That’s been our life up until now. Jasper actually figured out how to get out of crib a while back, but it involved climbing out onto a dresser, so we moved the dresser, and now just have fingers crossed that he’ll not figure out how to get out again until we’re ready.

    Lisa January 11, 2010 at 9:58 pm

    So happy for you!!!!

    Major Bedhead January 11, 2010 at 10:43 pm

    I’m envious. The Bug is 3.5 years old and still gets out of bed three or four nights a week to sleep with us. The snuggles are nice, but she’s like a leach, has to wrap herself around me (and only me) in order to stay asleep, which means I can’t really move at all and am reduced to lying there, cursing silently. I have no idea how to resolve this since she’s obviously not in a crib any more and her bedroom is off of ours, so she can come in at will.

    I’m glad to hear your finally getting some rest, though. Even if I am a bit green.
    .-= Major Bedhead´s last blog ..Squeeeeee!!! =-.

    Ali January 12, 2010 at 2:16 pm

    Put a baby gate up in the door way? That’s what I did when I wanted to stop my boy getting into the bathroom and flushing Lego down the toilet…

    Major Bedhead January 12, 2010 at 11:03 pm

    I had one up but she climbs over it, usually falling in the process.
    .-= Major Bedhead´s last blog ..The Bourdain Thing =-.

    Kristen Race, PhD January 12, 2010 at 1:31 am

    Wow, great post and great responses. So thoughtful and supportive, I love it. Curious what the Sleep Doula thinks of techniques incorporating yoga nidra or meditation. Research shows it has great effects on the young and the old, and can elicit responses in the brain that create the opportunity for kids to practice self-calming prior to, and during the dreaded bedtime process. There was a really interesting blog about this today (not mine) . I’ve seen the magical, yes magical, response by my kids, and other children as well, to this type of guided meditation. Again, would love to hear what the Doula, and others think.
    Thanks to all for sharing,

    Her Bad Mother January 12, 2010 at 2:55 pm

    Yoga and meditation have been recommended to me before – I’ll have to look into it. Whatever helps!

    Bella January 12, 2010 at 3:12 pm

    Yoga and meditation for WHOM?! I have a hard time imagining anything but the “mildest” forms of meditation (like, “imagine you’re on a boat floating…” ) actually working for a toddler, given his cognitive stage. But I CAN imagine both being very helpful for a sleep-deprived, stressed out mom. It did wonders for MY sanity when I was dealing with sleep-training hell…
    .-= Bella´s last blog ..Most common cause of early discipline problems =-.

    caramama January 13, 2010 at 6:05 pm

    I was just looking into kids yoga for my daughter, who is almost 3 years old and still has very little (if any) self-soothing skills. Thanks for the link! It was helpful to read that.
    .-= caramama´s last blog ..Question of the Week – Mommy and Me Activities =-.

    ggs_closet January 12, 2010 at 11:26 am

    That’s great. You must be over the moon.
    I had the opposite problem with my child. My child was a GREAT sleeper and had no problem with sleeping in her own bed UNTIL she turned 8. Now she is sleeping in our room and I don’t know how to get her back to her room. :(
    .-= ggs_closet´s last blog ..What’s New in Gigi’s Consignment Closet =-.

    mommymae January 12, 2010 at 2:01 pm

    i’m so happy for you that you found some help & it is working. you will all be happier once the schedule is set!
    .-= mommymae´s last blog ..oh, maw maw betty: a series of posts highlighting old family photos and the stories they tell =-.

    Cait January 12, 2010 at 2:29 pm

    Congrats! Hope it keeps up.

    Kristen Race, PhD January 12, 2010 at 4:06 pm


    I’ve had incredible success going into classrooms locally and teaching yoga and meditation to pre-schoolers. Most amazing have been the side conversations from teachers to me about changes in a particular child’s general temperment since startign the program. In relation to the sleep, not certain that the meditation has to be in the “mildest” form. Rather, it has to be developmentally appropriate in its presentation. It can still capture the basic elements of visualization, like you suggest, but also things like empowerment, breathing, body scanning, are easily understood by kids as soon as their brain development begins to capture the essence of imagination–usually around 3 1/2 years old. Hope that helps,


    Her Bad Mother January 12, 2010 at 8:38 pm

    Emilia (who is four) loves doing yoga (or ‘yogo’) with Waybuloo, which is a start, no? ;)

    Suzanne January 12, 2010 at 8:55 pm

    And here I was thinking how lucky I am it only took a week to night-wean my 9 month old and I was ALL SET to get a full night’s sleep for the next 18 years. I’ve been so focused on getting some sleep right now I didn’t even think about what would happen when he could get out of his crib. Or started having nightmares. Or separation anxiety. Or decided he hates the color blue and will only sleep in our yellow bedroom. Gah. I should probably just put my laptop down right now and sleep while I can.

    p.s. My success isn’t even absolute – we only made it three nights before he needed a boob at 4 am. Oh and did I mention he’s decided not to nap?
    .-= Suzanne´s last blog ..9 Month Stats =-.

    Kristen Race, PhD January 12, 2010 at 10:59 pm

    Not sure what Waybuloo is , but any yoga is great yoga as far as I’m concerned. Just so many benefits to it at any age. I’m now following you on twitter, looking forward to staying connected to your blog posts. They are very impressive.

    Her Bad Mother January 13, 2010 at 11:47 am

    Waybuloo is a kids’ show that features yoga (they call it yogo) and walks kids through simple moves and positions – BBC-made, I think.

    caramama January 13, 2010 at 6:10 pm

    I’m so glad you guys find something that seems to be working!

    We have also been struggling big time, and this weekend did a Baby Sleep Boot Camp (I made up the term myself!), which I’m in the middle of writing about. We are FINALLY getting some better sleep. I just hope it continues and that I didn’t jinx it.

    And BTW, a couple weeks ago, I was cosleeping with my baby boy and he grabbed my hair. My first thought was, whatever works to calm him down. Then he pulled hard. And then I thought of you! I quickly got my hair completely away from him and have kept it away since. So thank you SO MUCH for posting about your sleep-hair issues with Jasper. I think you saved me from the same issue! (My daughter used to play with my hair when she was little, but it was longer then and she didn’t ever really pull it, so I didn’t realize it could be an issue till you wrote about it!)
    .-= caramama´s last blog ..Question of the Week – Mommy and Me Activities =-.

    Her Bad Mother January 13, 2010 at 8:57 pm

    Baby Sleep Boot Camp – love it! Will have to check it out.

    And yeah, the hair thing. It’s still an issue, but as long as he’s not doing it when I’m trying to sleep, I can live with it, sort of ;)

    mapsgirl January 14, 2010 at 9:40 am

    I went to a Mom’s in the City event where the Sleep Doula ran a session about sleep. Wow…she is a very knowledgeable woman! I used many of the techniques she taught us to help my little one sleep.

    Now that we’re into a “big girl bed” I need to revisit her site to see what she has to say about kids who don’t stay in their own beds all night long.

    I’m so glad that you’re getting some sleep and that he’s learning that his crib is a nice place to sleep. (Is the Sleep Doula sleeping under his crib? I’ve heard that she’s done that before! LOL)
    .-= mapsgirl´s last blog ..i needed a laugh so you got a meme =-.

    6512 and growing January 14, 2010 at 6:03 pm

    Dude, that is excellent news! 20 months of sleep deprivation has been outlawed at Guantanamo.

    Considering the writing you’ve been putting out with no sleep, think how you’re going to dazzle us now!
    .-= 6512 and growing´s last blog ..The family, captured =-.

    Dagmar Bleasdale January 16, 2010 at 2:08 am

    Oh, do I wonder how I will ever get to sleep without my little boy… He sleeps in his own bed — with me next to him :)
    .-= Dagmar Bleasdale´s last blog ..Wordless Wednesday — Look Who Is Almost 1 =-.

    Laura (Nahbee) January 18, 2010 at 11:49 pm

    How cool! I’ve just hired the very same Sleep Doula, as we are now 22 (yes, I know…TWENTY-TWO!!!) months of crappy sleep. At the worst I was up every 45-60 minutes. Now it is 2-3 times a night, but the middle time is 2-4+ hours. :thud:

    I have been having these great big fears: what if this is the child who stumps The Sleep Doula? Now I feel so much better.

    Thanks for sharing.

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